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When asked about surviving and thriving, adventurer Erik Seversen says: “In my triangle of life, there’s work life, family life, and the self. I wake up excited to get to work every single day. I trained for the real mountain every day. When I climb big mountains, I go alone with guides, but I alone. I spend time thinking about how much I appreciate family and how much I appreciate easy things. I’m a better husband and father when I do the things that are exciting for me. It makes me more well-rounded as a father and a husband and for myself, I like a challenge “.
“Happiness is like a backpack. You either put it on or you don’t, and it’s absolutely a choice. Just getting things that are easy doesn’t make us feel fulfilled. The nature of challenges and continually working towards things that matter to us gives meaning to our lives and make us feel fulfilled. As we embrace the struggle something good can be coming from it. Purpose is something bigger than yourself. Meaning could be a by-product of happiness.”
Erik refers to Emily Esfahani Smith’s four pillars of meaning – Belonging, Purpose, Storytelling, and Transcendence. These four things create happiness. People are so concerned about seeking happiness that they forget that happiness is a byproduct, really what we need is meaning in our lives.
As long as we’re conscious we can choose our mental state. I strongly believe that if we seek meaningful relationships, we feel a sense of belonging. Life is so much better. We can do so much more together. It’s been a wonderful opportunity to make great connections around the world that bump my game up and as well as help other people as well.
Sometimes when we’re going through pain, we don’t know the impact that that pain is having on us. The impact of loss and grief can be trickling out in a way that is positive to someone else who’s looking at it and saying, if you can go through this, so can I.
Following constructive feedback from his editor who read the earlier draft of his first book, Ordinary to Extraordinary, Erik confesses, that he spent a year reworking that book. The version that got published is more reader focused rather than’ me’ focused. “Ordinary to Extraordinary” ended up taking off and became a best seller. It led to multiple public speaking requests. Erik ended up leaving his job doing international business development for a company to speak full time. That was January 2020. It was great for two months., Then in March 2020, everything disappeared.
Erik started going into a depression. This was unfamiliar territory for him. He opened his speeches and read what he had been telling people for two years. Happiness a choice. Success a choice. This immediately turn his depression around “Yes, I believe these things. Let’s get to work.”
Erik worked out that readers who are now desperate for quality mindset stuff are thinking about things about making the planet a better place for humanity. “I feel like my place on earth is finding these amazing people who have time to write one chapter and combining them into a book.”
One of them is Peak Performance mindset tools for leaders, winning mindset, the successful mind.
On his imposter syndrome
“I was thinking every single one of these people is smarter and better than me.” Erik shares about his imposter syndrome when he started attending UCLA.
His teacher, Dr. Peter Hammond, recognised this. He took Erik under his wing a little bit. “First we had a coffee together, then we had lunch together. Then he would actually invite me to the teacher’s lounge and we had meals together once in a while. He really showed me that I did belong at that table. And not only that, but he also showed me how to really excel and fast forward a year and a half from that, I ended up winning best undergraduate research at UCLA. That would have never happened if this professor wouldn’t have recognized my imposter syndrome thinking that the other students were better than me. All he did was encourage me a little bit and foster this idea that not only do you deserve to be here, but you can also really excel.”
“Sometimes my self doubt is in fact self-doubt. It’s not that I’m not good enough, it’s that I think I’m not good enough, but you know what? It’s not over. I still have imposter syndrome from time to time. Now I tell myself, “this is me growing. I want to be in a room with people who are super successful. I celebrate when I feel imposter syndrome. I tell people, if you don’t feel imposter syndrome from time to time, if you don’t doubt your abilities from time to time, you might not be pushing yourself as hard as you could”.
On the death of his father
When his dad died suddenly, Erik asked himself, “how am I going to respond to this? My dad taught me the value of hard work. And I knew that’s what he would want me to do. I celebrated his life and what he had taught me in his whole life about hard work by mowing the lawn moments after I learned he died. And that’s, how I processed it. We can choose to be happy. I thought I believed it, but I didn’t know I believed it until that day”.
To Erik’s younger self
I would just tell myself, keep taking these one steps at a time and you’re moving in the right direction.
“I would say, don’t change much, just keep going. Admittedly, wasn’t easy, that’s why I would say, don’t worry, it’s all going to be all right. I struggled, lots of times. My advice to others is whatever you’re doing, even if it’s not perfect, is an important part of your journey. You’re taking the right steps towards your destiny. I wouldn’t want the imposter syndrome to go away. It helped make me who I am. I wouldn’t want my rejection from UCLA to go away